MAY 14
This was about the time it started to get really hot
where I live. My husband and I had to put window units upstairs to give
the house AC a break and prevent it from freezing up. It was working
double-time because my mother refused to run the AC downstairs. I'd
explained to her countless times that heat rises, and the temperature
upstairs can get into the high 80's. My cats would suffer tremendously
if that happened. She complained to us that the homeowner's association
would throw a fit about the window units, and told us to remove them
despite the fact that no one could see them from the street.
When we refused, she tried to blame us for how hot it was upstairs. She asked, "do you have blinds in that room? I went outside and looked, your blinds are up!" Yes, the blinds were lifted for the cats to look outside from behind the blackout curtains I bought to make it cooler upstairs. She then asked, "do you shut down your computers?" Of course we did, we weren't stupid.
In all her accusations, she conveniently ignored the fact that, not only did she refuse to turn on the AC downstairs, but she would also leave the back door open, letting in the +90°F air. I think she just wanted to create something else to fight about.
When we refused, she tried to blame us for how hot it was upstairs. She asked, "do you have blinds in that room? I went outside and looked, your blinds are up!" Yes, the blinds were lifted for the cats to look outside from behind the blackout curtains I bought to make it cooler upstairs. She then asked, "do you shut down your computers?" Of course we did, we weren't stupid.
In all her accusations, she conveniently ignored the fact that, not only did she refuse to turn on the AC downstairs, but she would also leave the back door open, letting in the +90°F air. I think she just wanted to create something else to fight about.
JUNE 28
My mother's cat had to be euthanized. He was constipated again, so badly that he couldn't eat. He was severely dehydrated, his fur was filthy. I took one look at him and knew he was dying. My mother asked me if he could still be okay, but I told her that if she didn't let him go that day, she would be prolonging his suffering. It was his time.
Turns out he had kidney disease. If my mother had just paid for the blood work, we would've known months ago. He could've been treated, lived longer, and wouldn't have died so miserable. I blame her for his suffering, and sometimes, when I think long enough about it, I hate her for it.
Turns out he had kidney disease. If my mother had just paid for the blood work, we would've known months ago. He could've been treated, lived longer, and wouldn't have died so miserable. I blame her for his suffering, and sometimes, when I think long enough about it, I hate her for it.
In September of 2018, she had to euthanize her other cat. The first time we'd brought her to the vet, she had a serious blood infection, but we also learned that she had hyperthyroidism, which was why she was so skinny all of a sudden. She healed from the infection but the vet also prescribed a high-calorie food and recommended we get a high-calorie additive. I ordered a high-calorie paste, and explained to my mother how to give it to her cat. She stopped giving it to her cat after a week. As a consequence, the cat began to starve to death. Her muscles atrophied until she couldn't hold herself up anymore, and that's when she was euthanized.
I blame my mother for that, too. I feel like her laziness killed her cats. I can't think of anything more selfish.
I blame my mother for that, too. I feel like her laziness killed her cats. I can't think of anything more selfish.
AUGUST 26
For some reason, and without notice, my mother decided it was mine and my husband's responsibility to take out the garbage and recyclables, something she'd been doing for 30-some-odd years without issue or complaint. It wouldn't have been a problem for us to take it out, and we certainly would have, but we were never asked to do it, and we weren't aware that she was refusing to do it anymore.
The garbage was supposed to go out for collection the next day, but it didn't. The garbage was rancid and maggots were all over the inside of the bin. To make things worse, a hurricane was supposed to make landfall the next week, so garbage collection would be cancelled. My mother sent me a text message that said: "the garbage should've been taken out last night." This was when I figured out that she wasn't going to take the garbage out anymore. I could only read snark and condescension from the text.
She took the bin outside and didn't even try to clean it, demanding I come outside and clean it. She faked struggling with the garbage bags inside the bin for so long that I finally told her to just let me do it, otherwise we would've been there forever.
After the storm, the maggots that were still in the garage had erupted into fully-grown flies. There were so many that they blocked out a large portion of the garage window. Once again, my mother acted helpless and expected me to be the one to clean up her mess, though she still clearly blamed me and my husband for the infestation.
She sent me another message later about how angry she was in finding a single fly in her bathroom. She knew when garbage was supposed to go out. We didn't. She knew that she was refusing to take it out. We didn't. It aggravated me so much that she couldn't admit responsibility for something so stupid and preventable.
The garbage was supposed to go out for collection the next day, but it didn't. The garbage was rancid and maggots were all over the inside of the bin. To make things worse, a hurricane was supposed to make landfall the next week, so garbage collection would be cancelled. My mother sent me a text message that said: "the garbage should've been taken out last night." This was when I figured out that she wasn't going to take the garbage out anymore. I could only read snark and condescension from the text.
She took the bin outside and didn't even try to clean it, demanding I come outside and clean it. She faked struggling with the garbage bags inside the bin for so long that I finally told her to just let me do it, otherwise we would've been there forever.
After the storm, the maggots that were still in the garage had erupted into fully-grown flies. There were so many that they blocked out a large portion of the garage window. Once again, my mother acted helpless and expected me to be the one to clean up her mess, though she still clearly blamed me and my husband for the infestation.
She sent me another message later about how angry she was in finding a single fly in her bathroom. She knew when garbage was supposed to go out. We didn't. She knew that she was refusing to take it out. We didn't. It aggravated me so much that she couldn't admit responsibility for something so stupid and preventable.
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